What She Heard: "You look like you must eat 5 square meals a day. I know chunky chicks don't turn down food, so maybe you're hungry enough to let me take you for a meal. Also, you need a work out plan."
Why It's Wack: You must think the promise of food will wipe out my common sense. Why would I choose to share a meal with someone who is so clearly without intuition for a person's emotions or potential insecurities? Also, further evidence that parking lot pimpin' doesn't really work.
I Think What You Meant Was: "I think the only thing we might have in common is that we both eat lunch. Maybe if I let you know that I hover around your workplace enough to note your patterns of ingress and egress, you'll recognize that I'm attentive and appreciative of your routine. Also, I think you have a pulse, so that's a bonus."
Next time, try: Saying hello, offering me a prepared salad or sandwich (preferably with some sort of hygienic seal) with your name and number written on a napkin.
*Thanks to the unstoppable JL for this one.
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