at a club party

The line: [grabbing my hand, trying to pull me to the dancefloor] "Girl, you need some exercise. Come dance with me so I can work you out."

What I Heard: You're fat. I'm a personal trainer you don't want to use.

Why It's Wack: You must think I came here because the gym was closed. If you're so concerned with my health, you should offer to run a marathon with me, not bother me with your sorry excuse for Thursday night cardio.

I Think What You Meant Was: "I'm already sweaty and I'm a little concerned that you and your friends are making jokes about me [ed.- TRUE]. Maybe if you're sweaty too, I can get through the next hour without having to find a clean shirt somewhere."

Next time, try: dancing further away from me.

a short break...

you may (or may not) have noticed a little lull in posts in the past 8 months.

i wish i could say it was because the lines got better, but really i was on a little break from fun called work and more work.

apparently things are just as i left them. i guess it's time to get back on the case... stay tuned for some new gems and pass along whatever you've been saving up while i've been gone.